Cans gone wild: Don’t try this at home.

I may have given the kids botulism.

No, seriously.

Recently, my friend Kelli and I tried our hands at canning. First, we started with applesauce.  Her husband walked us through it.  (He’d been doing it in our family for years).  No problems there.

The following week, we branched out with pears, sweet potatoes, carrots, and soups.  We worked for two days like old farmers’ wives.  I was thrilled that I had foodstuffs that we made from scratch and canned.

It was on my list of things to learn before I die. *to be published soon

When I returned from Hilton Head/Savannah, I received an urgent message from Kelli.  She texts: Something went wrong with the canning.  Some of the cans leaked and exploded.  The smell is unbearable. 

My brain rewinds to the canned pear sauce and sweet potatoes I left for the boys when they stayed at my moms.  Did I food poison them?

I immediately head down to the pantry in our basement.  The smell that greeted me was a mixture of rotting carcass and unbrushed teeth.   Sure enough, our “mix veggie” cans were oozing and foaming.

I think of the hours wasted.  The trips to the fruit market.  The hours wasted.  Then, I head to google, and discover that the bacteria in cans gone bad is BOTULISM.  I worry for days on end that I may have poisoned the boys.

The better part of the next hour was spent dumping all that hard work down the garbage disposal, running to Tar-jay to buy bleach (which this green momma NEVER uses), and disinfect the hell out of every surface in contact with the ooze.

Luckily, no trips to the ER, but until I get a better handle on this whole post-modern Martha Stewart thing, I’ll stick with cooking, pureeing, and FREEZING.

Yeah, frozen food is much lower maintenance.

But it is better to have canned, than have not canned at all.